Thanks to Llamaface’s boss being a total asshat, Llama didn’t get any of his requested vacation time approved & only had Dec. 24 & 25 off. So we had our own little family celebration after he got off work on Dec. 21, in part to reduce the overwhelming nature of the holidays on Boogermonkey and in part so I could find out what Llama got me He took the pearl we got from this tourist-trap “tap the oyster & get a pearl” place when we visited San Francisco to Ben Bridge & had them make a pendant. Just a solitary pearl hanging from a white gold box chain, and it’s absolutely perfect. It was a total surprise, and he was worried I wouldn’t like it, but it’s totally perfect. I love it. It’s sentimental & romantic & I wear it every day. He got lots of kisses for that one
So then we had 2 days where he had to work late, in which I had to prepare for our trip south. Wrapping, organizing, laundry, everything was on me. It got done, thankyouverymuch. Dec. 23 we headed down to Portland after Llama got off work late, arrived at Llamamama’s house just past 1 a.m. and proceeded to cram the three of us (four if you count my belly) into her full-sized bed. Full-sized beds are, just for the record, too small for two adults and a toddler who likes to sleep on the diagonal.
The Llama family celebrates on Christmas Eve, and normally presents aren’t opened until midnight, but between not having a nap, eating WAY too many M&Ms at Llama’s friend Eric’s house, and it being past his bedtime, Booger was getting far too cranky to keep him up that late.
Booger likes Eric because he gives him chocolate.
Eric had these glasses that, when you looked at lights, turned the lights into snowmen. It was a little freaky, but Booger loved them.
So we acquiesced and started the gift chaos at 9ish. Now, let me start by saying that I love the Llama family. All drama aside, they are a caring, generous, boisterous bunch. But I hate the way they open gifts. It is total chaos, with people opening stuff all at once in rapid succession. Booger got stuff I didn’t even know about until afterward because I didn’t see him opening it, and that makes me a little sad because he finds such JOY in opening gifts. Not the gifts themselves (that comes later), just the tearing of paper. Because he’s two.
Llamabrother LOVED his hand-knit socks.
So once the living room was clean and the family had all gone home, Booger & I went to bed, with Llama making himself comfortable on the floor. We headed out the next morning for Eugene for a much smaller celebration at my mother’s house. My entire family was 1/3 the number of people at the Llama household the day before, and it was nice to not have to explain to a capital-EFF Fundamentalist why using “gay” as a negative adjective was a bad thing. Yes, I really did do that at the Llama house. I don’t think he got it. Of course, his eyes did that “I have no idea what you just said, but I’ll pretend like I understood” thing when I used the phrase “pejorative adjective,” so that could have had something to do with it. I’m glad I had knitting in my hands when he said, “I’m the most persecuted group there is – white, male, Christian. There’s no one more persecuted in this country than I am,” because otherwise I might have hurt him. Anyway, while we waited for dinner to finish cooking, Little Brother entertained Booger. Notice the red Hugh Heffner pajamas Booger’s wearing. They have become his favorite outfit and he insists on wearing the shirt any time he wears the pants.
Booger plays slide guitar while Little Brother jams with him.
Llama went to pick up Nana from her house and we had a late lunch/early dinner of Cornish game hen, potato salad, stuffing, and a few other sides.
Booger ponders the logistics of eating an entire Cornish game hen.
Oh, look! Olives have holes in them the same size as my fingers!
Oh, how I love olives! Nom nom nom.
Why yes, I can fit five olives in my mouth at once. You were concerned I couldn’t?
My grandmother is funny and apologized to Booger for giving him a gift in a sack instead of wrapped in paper. “I ran out of paper,” she said, as though he comprehends that or cares.
Bath toys for Booger!
Once the presents were all opened, we dressed Booger up and he started dancing to the tune my mother’s Christmas tchotchke plays. It’s this wind-up thing with magnets in it and Mr. & Mrs. Claus ice-skate around to “Jingle Bells.” “I like that beautiful song,” he kept saying. You can see the tchotchke on the floor by Mom’s right hand.
He wears that smock now any time he helps me with chores like laundry or getting the mail.
Dance, Booger, dance!
A testament to Little Brother’s horticultural prowess, those miniature pumpkins are just as stable as they were the day they were picked in October.
After bringing Nana home & a brief snooze for Llama, we headed back to Portland to spend the night, then came back to Seattle early the next morning so Llama could deal with all the assholes who shop the day after Christmas. Fucking spend some time with your families, or clean your house, or something, but don’t fucking threaten the retail employee who can’t give you a refund because to do so would be against policy because you don’t have the packaging, you don’t have a gift receipt, and you’re not willing to take a gift card. Get your crack money somehow else, asshole. *deep breath out*
Anywho, that was our Christmas. It would have been nice to spend more time with both halves of the family, at least a full day with both of them, and maybe see some friends, too, but that just wasn’t in the cards this year. Maybe next year. Llama has contacted someone who works at the administrative level for a major company based in Portland (not naming names to avoid jinxing things), and we’re hoping that pans out. This woman is his little sister’s boyfriend’s mom, so it’s kind of a personal contact, in a roundabout way. It would be really, REALLY nice for him to work for this company, given the opportunity for advancement within the corporation.